No Contact

So, I guess it's been a while since I've been on here. I don't know why I stopped writing things; it was very amusing reading over all my previous blogs and shenans. And it was pretty easy to remember what was going on at that time in my life--especially the last two. So many things I never touched on that had huge impacts on my life. Maybe I can touch on some of those now, though why I bother when no one ever reads this, I don't know.

Hopefully I can go see Jeremy today. I'm in one of those moods, though; pensive, instead of just sad. Things are becoming complicated again. I feel like Bella, from Twilight. Only my Jacob is more asshole-ish than the character in the novel. And less trustworthy. We're hardly friends--that title would constitute a bit more talking and interaction than what me and my Jacob do (which is a text once maybe every two or three days)--and I find myself unwilling to color in that definition. He can't be trusted. Not a word, not a breath, not a movement. This is what's killing our attempts to be friends. That, and he doesn't want to be just friends. Tug of war.

I only have about another month off before I return to college. I'm disappointed that I've hardly written anything this summer, the way I've wanted to. Things have been difficult. I want to start again, only I have so many thoughts bouncing around inside of my mind that it's a challenge to grab the right one. I haven't felt this way in a long time. It lets me know something isn't right, however, so I have to listen to myself when I feel this way.

Anyway. I have to go--I have a few things I need to do concerning college, actually. Hopefully I can get back on here soon and express more self-doubt and pity. After all, I am the only one who reads these.

Toodles.